It’s that time again for TGITDNMAR, which (obviously) stands for Thank God It’s The Day New Movies Are Released.
The Cabin in the Woods
Sometimes, life can really surprise you. I was 100% all set to come here and start off by telling you something like, “Full disclosure: I’ve never seen, and barely know anything about the original Cabin in the Woods,” and then I’d beg for your forgiveness or something.
As you probably know – the joke’s on me! So trained am I to the (obvious) notion that every single horror flick released anymore is a sequel or remake, I never thought twice about Cabin – I could have sworn that there was remake talk back when I posted one of the first-ever news items here at Man, I Love Films (wrong again).
So, whereas before I was prepared to hear from “fans of the original” decrying the weird tech stuff going on here (methinks something is afoot at the old cabin, no?), such preconceptions have now been flipped on their head, with me wondering along with possibly everyone else just what in the hell is going on at the cabin? Clearly, The Evil Dead this is not.
Dylan’s Chance of Viewing (in the theater): HOT
The Three Stooges
Though it would undoubtedly be much more fun to see Stooges turn into the punching bag that we all know it is (box office and critical flop, multiple Razzies to come…), I must admit that there’s a part of me that really wants it to do well. To deliver the Farrelly Brothers back from the depths of irrelevance (after The Heartbreak Kid and Hall Pass), to revive (?) the careers of Will Sasso and Sean Hayes, and to make a star out of this guy with the long name who, bad as the film might be, kills it as Moe (there are some takeaways from the trailer, after all).
If Peter and Bobby Farrelly can bring the funny while simultaneously keeping the already-out-of-date “topical” references to a minimum (Snooki…ugh; see also, The Dictator and Megan Fox/Kim Kardashian), I will hold out hope that this can turn into even a mild success a la Problem Child (which it resembles in the trailer). My faith in such a result is pretty low, but it’s worth a shot.
Have fun seeing it for me, though.
Dylan’s Chance of Viewing (in the theater): NOT
Lockout
We all know this looks like trash – 90s era fun trash, if you will, but trash nonetheless. Still, there’s something undeniably fun about it, and it probably all starts and ends with Guy Pearce. An acting enigma if ever there was one, the man is tied to no genre and seemingly no type, even. Although he’s not shown up in a Vietnam war flick in blackface a la Bob Downey, Jr. in Tropic Thunder, it probably wouldn’t surprise me all that much if he did.
Here, the formerly skinny Aussie packs a ton of muscle to rescue Maggie Grace from a spacestation. I’m sure the plot matters a lot.
See it for Guy, and see it for Peter Stormare, who makes everything he’s in more fun.
Dylan’s Chance of Viewing (in the theater): HOT
Wayne (8)
Andrew (6)
Josh (6)
John (5)
Lauren (5)
Steve (5)
Dave Enkosky (4)
Jessica (4)
Justin (4)
Nick (3)
HAHAHAHA
Twitter: manilovefilms
April 11, 2012 8:28 pm
Haha. I’ll probably try to see Cabin, just for the Whedon factor. Though it might be too scary for me.
You’ve gotta let me know how it treats you. I’m staying away because of the horror factor, but it pains me because it will be the first Whedon project that I have to skip.
Twitter: manilovefilms
April 11, 2012 8:30 pm
Shit, I guess I’ll be seeing a Whedon vehicle before either of you two. It doesn’t appear to be alllll that nasty, so I have no problems with it.
Man, I continue to be bummed by the Farrellys’ mediocrity spiral. Seriously, what happened to those guys?
Twitter: manilovefilms
April 11, 2012 8:31 pm
Part of me thinks that we changed more than they did. If The Heartbreak Kid or even Fever Pitch had come out in the 90s, I feel like they would have been much more popular, but their schtick became pretty familiar to us and they’ve never diverged much from it. I’ll always have a warm and fuzzy place for Kingpin, Dumb/Dumber and Mary, though.
HA! HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!
Dylan Fields, you’re my hero!
-Jason
Hot Not! I love it.
Twitter: agracru
April 12, 2012 7:10 am
Everyone should be going to see Cabin.
I think we can all safely agree that most of us would rather chew on tinfoil or punch our genitals for 24 hours straight than go to see The Three Stooges on purpose (which, frankly, might as well be subtitled “In Which The Stooges Brutalize The Cast Of The Jersey Shore”). And Lockout sounds like a wait-for-DVD picture based on being watered down for theatrical release. What else is there? Cabin.
I’m a horror fan, but I feel confident saying that even if you’re just the type to occasionally stay up late with some friends and watch a horror film for the thrill of being scared in the dark, Cabin will entertain you. Maybe horror fans– or people who don’t have an aversion to horror, the sort of people who watch the big name horror movies but don’t muck around with lesser releases– will get the most out of it, but Cabin works on a number of levels beyond being a game-changing bit of genre commentary.
On that note I’m also going to encourage people to see Detention, which also does the meta horror thing but to a much reduced degree. It uses slasher films as a framework but veers far away from slasher stuff for big chunks of its running time (if I had to describe it in terms of X meets Y, it’s slasher films meet Scott Pilgrim). Detention has a way limited release, but if you get the chance, make it a double feature with Cabin.
Twitter: manilovefilms
April 12, 2012 8:29 am
I think you just made (fellow MILF writer) Nick Jobe’s head explode.
Hell, you perked my ears way up for Detention, and I barely care about horror flicks.
Nice to hear the good words about Cabin. There sure as hell ain’t that much out in theaters that I care about seeing, so who knows – I might actually make it my next trip.
Twitter: agracru
April 12, 2012 9:07 am
I’m guessing the head explosion has to do with the Scott Pilgrim comparison? If so, I don’t want to warp expectations, but you’ll see some commonalities in terms of stylistic touches and thematic stuff between the two of them (though Detention is still far removed from Scott Pilgrim).
I hope you see Cabin, and if you do I hope you love it as much as I did. Hell, I’m going to pay to go see it with a friend next week. That’s saying something right there.
Lockout looks pretty terrible to me but in a good way. Definitely a rental. The Three Stooges looks terribly terrible to me but in a bad way. I will burn every copy that gets in my hands.
I might check out Cabin in the Woods if it gets really good reviews.
Twitter: agracru
April 12, 2012 5:59 pm
…movies.com just gave Stooges a solid 4-star review. What. The. Fuck?