As inspired by one of our readers this week, Jeff Morelli, I concocted a list about directors that generally make good films, but even these movie giants have fallen short on occasion. The problem I came to was some directors like Ridley Scott, David Fincher, Christopher Nolan and Martin Scorsese just haven’t made an awful movie. Maybe some not perfect, but certainly not awful. Let’s celebrate these fantastical directors by pointing out their faux pas!
10. THE DILEMMA (RON HOWARD)
WTF?!?!?!?! I dug the cast, again particularly enjoying Channing Tatum, but this flick was nothing better than absolute horse pudding. I couldn’t finish watching it and it’s a very, very rare occasion when I turn off a movie because it’s so awful. One of the worst movies I’ve seen in a long time, and by one of my favorite feel good directors.
9. ELIZABETHTOWN (CAMERON CROWE)
What was largely missing from this film was Crowe’s quiet sense of comedy. He can generally tap into real human awkwardness and emote it in a way that becomes tangible rather than exploiting it. There were only brief moments of that balanced genius. Susan Sarandon’s big finale felt like it was trying to go there, but was more or less anti-climatic and uncomfortable. It just never came together. Elizabethtown wasn’t completely awful, but in no way did it live up to Crowe’s potential genius. It fell into the realm of the typical romantic comedy, and left me feeling “irked” at times. This guy can write, and this movie was not a good example of it.
8. ROLLERBALL (JOHN MCTIERNAN)
Here is a guy who knows how to make action films. From Predator to his last film Basic quite a bit ago, his Rollerball remake in 2002 just didn’t do it. What was great about the original with James Caan was some of the campiness and the fact that it was James Caan at his peak of hotness. McTiernan’s version took itself too seriously and lost all that was charming about the original. Not a complete crash landing but certainly a misstep in a very impressive career.
7. THE GODFATHER PART III (FRANCIS FORD COPPOLA)
I can’t make this list without mentioning the atrocity of GP3. I have not seen Coppola’s entire body of work like most of the other director’s mentioned here, but every other film of his I have seen has been nothing short of exquisite with a clear attention to the smallest of details. GP3 was an utter mess, with terrible acting and all together with no respect for it’s predecessors, two of the greatest films ever made. A tragedy beyond anything else.
6. TIM BURTON (PLANET OF THE APES)
I’ve been a fan of good ole Tim’s work over the years, and while his films have lost some of their originality and greatness this past decade he still manages to be creatively innovative and take his audience to world where his mind truly exists. And Helena Bonham Carter. And Johnny Depp. Thankfully Depp wasn’t available for this trite remake. With some great actors attached; this movie was all flash and no bang. Visually executed perfectly, but lacking any substance or originality. I’d rather watch Chuck’s version any day.
5. OLIVER STONE (ALEXANDER)
Love him or hate him, Stone has pumped out well thought out critically acclaimed movies over the decades. What they do have in common, aside from his largely biased political commentary is length. Alexander had all the potential in the world to be a great epic tale of history and and the rise and fall of a compelling historic character. The length not only killed this movie, but buried it with cockroaches, flesh eating beetles, and suffered an alien abduction of editors. It was well cast, but the writing and drawn out scenes made it insufferable and an epic disappointment.
4. ROBERT ZEMECKIS (WHAT LIES BENEATH)
Being a fan of Robert Zemeckis’s body of work, with a heartfelt affection for Back To The Future, it was a sorry experience to sit through the miserable film What Lies Beneath featuring the enigmatic Harrison Ford and the luminous Michelle Pfieffer. The writing was tragic enough, but the horror and mystery twist was played all wrong. With a great career I feel bad giving RZ the “shame on you”, but this flick really deserves a wicked finger shake.
3. SUNSHINE (DANNY BOYLE)
The first half an hour of the film is suspenseful, curious, and visually compelling. After it seems their mission is possibly in jeopardy the film suddenly takes a turn for the worst and unfortunately blatantly follows conceptions already realized by other science fictions films and shows. Alien, Event Horizon, Babylon 5 and 2001 A Space Odyssey. There is never an issue when an homage is being paid to another film, but when a story is visually and conceptually are executed the same as four other prominent creations in the science fiction world there is a problem. Especially coming from such an innovative and brilliant director.
2. ARMAGEDDON (MICHAEL BAY)
Michael bay may not be a highly regarded director, but I’ve found his films to be consistently entertaining over the years. When I sit down I know what to expect from one of his movies, and while Armageddon may be revered and considered one of his best movies, I’ll get right back on my soap box and claim this one an example of utter poo poo. They should have just skipped the semantics and sent Micheal Bay directly to the Asteroid. It would have exploded and the movie would have been over in twenty minutes. Twenty of course because Micheal Bay would make sure it was a super big and cool special effect! The only redeeming thing about this film was the Areosmith song and that’s because it was at the end of the movie. What a waste of explosives.
1. WAR OF THE WORLDS (STEVEN SPIELBERG)
Steven Spielburg took a very dark and depressing turn for this alien film, making life and survival seem all together hopeless. When the Ferrier’s are in their car, at the bridge, the chaos and fear is truly palpable. Though giant tripods haven’t taken over the world, yet; I imagine the way the human reaction interpreted by Spielburg would not be a long shot by any means. This film had a lot of quality and excellent pacing until the moment when Ray Ferrier’s son proclaims the need to join the army and fight the aliens even though he’s witnessed an unimaginable amount of destruction that the human race was ill equipped to counter. The unrealistic act of leaving his terrified sister and father in that moment is so far fetched that suspension of disbelief is not an option. From that point on the film continues in a downward spiral that is unforgivable and relentless in it’s shameful creation. The entire act with Tim Robbins helping Rachael and Ray by hiding them in his basement completely offsets the pacing and turns the film into a completely different movie. Suddenly it’s about the violence and desperation of human nature rather than a pretty intense alien flick. The character Oglivy, played by Robbins had absolutely no place in the story, and was the biggest disappointment of the entire film.
Yes, he stayed true to the story line, but your Steven fucking Spielberg, you can do what you want.
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No way would I include Sunshine on this list. The last 30 minutes kinda stumbles, but the majority of the film is great.
Also… Fincher hasn’t made a bad film? Clearly you haven’t seen Alien3.
Not sure if I would could Godfather 3 or Jack as Coppola’s worst.
Twitter: heather_kenobi
May 23, 2012 6:38 am
I almost added Alien 3, but on it’s own it’s not a tragically horrible movie. As in inclusion to the series and homage to my Ripley it’s terrible, but I didn’t think it bad enough to say an awful smudge in his career. Certainly not a high point though.
I thought Sunshine started off well, but not 30 minutes into it and I wasn’t even appalled, I was angry, frustrated, and pissed off. It takes a lot for me to get that invested in the concept of a film and watch it systematically fuck itself over. Just my thoughts.
Twitter: ftstweets
May 23, 2012 7:44 am
Another thing is that was Fincher’s first film, which I don’t think should count as much as these other films made after the directors are already quite accomplished.
Plus FOX really screwed him over when he was shooting the movie.
Twitter: heather_kenobi
May 23, 2012 10:41 am
Thanks guys. I remember seeing it in the theatre back in the day and I hated it then. I’ve watched it several times over since and it isn’t nearly as bad, but I’ve always taken into consideration it was his first feature film.
It’s really interesting to hit IMDb and see how many big directors have done a lot of work in the music world as well.
I feel how you do about Alien3 with Godfather 3. I think G3 is a decent film on its own and is mostly disappointing in comparison to the other two. But to me, Alien3 is a disaster even on its own. Agree to disagree!
My first thought when I saw Coppola was Jack. Jeez, what a pile.
Also, Ridley Scott has a clean record? Did you see Robin Hood?
And I agree on Sunshine. More than the first half hour is good in that film. It trips in the third act.
Twitter: heather_kenobi
May 23, 2012 6:40 am
I liked Robin Hood, and though it wasn’t great it certainly wasn’t a massive misstep in his career. He’s probably one of the most consistent directors that puts out a lot of movies. Guys like Cameron, Nolan, and Fincher I love but they don’t make a ton of movies, Ridley Scott does and I celebrate how much I can trust in his film making.
Well played on Jack, I had completely forgotten about it.
Hey! I mentioned Jack, too…
Yes, but I make it look better.
Twitter: ptsnob
May 23, 2012 7:34 am
Oh no! Sunshine! It’s not even one of Boyle’s weaker movies, I’m with you on most of these, especially the awful Planet of the Apes.
I think Godfather III is poor more in relation to the first two than on its own (if you ignore Sofia Coppola’s acting). Jack was the first thing I thought of there too like the others.
Can’t argue with most of these being bad. I didn’t even realize Ron Howard did The Dilemma. WTF? I will say that after watching The Lost World again last week, it’s much worse than War of the Worlds. Still, it’s pretty much splitting hairs in the bottom group of Spielberg’s movies.
Twitter: heather_kenobi
May 23, 2012 10:43 am
The Terminal was the other one I considered a bad Spielberg touch, but then I think that was enjoyed by a lot of people and WOTW was an atrocity.
I was shocked when I saw Howard was responsible for The Dilemma too.
I can’t say I’m surprised to see support for Sunshine. I feel like it was a movie people either loved or hated and probably very little in between.
I agree about Sunshine it’s a bad film being praised by people for God knows what. Though to be honest Slumdog is even worse than that, especially comparing to Boyle’s earlier work.
I did enjoy War of the Worlds and Elizabethtown, though, however they are definetly not the best they could be if the director was at the top of his game.
Twitter: heather_kenobi
May 23, 2012 10:44 am
Elizabethtown I didn’t think was absolutely awful, but it was definitely a disappointment when compared with Crowes other writing. For me it slipped into more of a Nora Ephron world.
Yeah I have to disagree on War of the Worlds too. The brother leaving and all, sure not great stuff, but this was hardly his worst effort. May I suggest Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull?
Twitter: heather_kenobi
May 23, 2012 10:47 am
I think I’m one of the few you’ll find defending that flick. It wasn’t without flaws, but I found it entertaining and even at times charming. The series could have done without a revamp but like all things in that capacity, it just isn’t going to be what the others were and living up to that hype and expectations may have been it’s biggest downfall. And the Aliens. I could have done without the Alien theme, but religion and magic in the other movies, so it wasn’t far fetched when considering plenty of ancient culture is considered connected with the possibility of Aliens. Sooooooooooooo…………in circles I go!
When I think of bad Spielberg, I don’t think anything will top Always. I didn’t think Spielberg was capable of making a movie that crappy. But that’s just, like, my opinion, man.
I was ok with War of the Worlds for the most part, though it bugged the crap out of me that the dumb son magically lived at the end. I just saw The Terminal a few weeks ago and genuinely liked it.
Come on, John! You liked the Terminal? You’ve got better taste than that! The only reason I saw for making that film was to advertise Burger King and the other stores they visited.
WotW wasn’t good, but it was kind of entertaining.
It’s definitely very low grade Spielberg, and the romance was shoehorned in. It had flaws, without a doubt. You nailed it about the Burger King stuff. But on the whole, I felt that it was fine for what it was- a soft comedy with some charm.
Always, on the other hand, made me grimace and laugh mockingly.
Twitter: fandangogroover
May 23, 2012 12:45 pm
I agree with about half of the list but disagree on some of it. Tim Burton has really lost his way and hasn’t made a great film for over a decade. Planet of the Apes was the start of things to come and not just a blip.
Robert Zemeckis hasn’t made that many great films, for me What Lies Beneath is his best film since Who Framed Roger Rabbit.
While Sunshine isn’t Danny Boyle’s best film it is still good and doesn’t deserve a place on the list.
Michael Bay is a hack director, Armageddon is on a par with other work and is better than Pearl Harbor and Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.
Twitter: kaiderman
May 27, 2012 10:16 am
Zemeckis did Gump between What Lies Beneath & Who Framed Roger Rabbit, dude.
I enjoy Beowulf & Cast Away as well but those have come out since. Beowulf surprised the hell out of me because I had zero interest in it and then rewatched it twice.
Tossing my hat into the Sunshine wouldn’t find its way onto any version of this list created by me contingent. Quite differently than most I constantly rank it among my all time favorite films. Not top 10 or anything but it definitely orbits around my top 100, pun intentional.
I’ve never thought The Godfather III was a bad film, but definitely a disappointing one and one I feel didn’t need to be made. However, I’ve seen it a couple of times now and I think it suits its purpose.
I see War of the Worlds pop up on these lists all the time. Lots of posts I see on this are simple long resonating anti-Cruise sentiments which I always disregard as a point of criticism. By and large I think it’s 95% great with the final 5% of the movie falling like a thud at astronomic proportions. The sequence with Robbins never bothered me… in fact it was one of my favorite sequences of the entire film.
As for Michael Bay… let’s be honest nobody in history has been better at putting a good shine on what is undeniably a turd.
Of course I don’t want to spend an entire comment disagreeing with your selections. 100% with you on What Lies Beneath, Rollerball, and The Dilemma.
Zemeckis hasn’t made a good film since the early 90s; Beowulf anyone? Contact? A Christmas Carol?
Coppola is one of those whose work is just very spotty; when he’s on he’s on, when he’s off, it’s embarrassing. But I’m with you on The Godfather Part III; WTF? The first two are so good, it almost makes the last one worse than it is.
As for Bay: Armageddon was actually the most enjoyable for me. Any of the Transformers films made me plug my ears because of all the NEEDLESS EXPLOSIONS.
Isn’t Armageddon they epitome of every Michael Bay movie? I agree it’s crap, but it’s the same crap Bay always serves up. Even in a bizarro world, I’m pretty sure Michael Bay should never be on a “good director” list.
Twitter: kaiderman
May 27, 2012 10:11 am
I actually love 5 of these movies…
Elizabethtown – Good not great. I enjoy it even though it feels like a carbon copy of Jerry Maguire.
Alexander – I fully understand that I am alone on this one but I don’t hate the film.
Armageddon & War of the Worlds – These are great mindless action films. I like them.
Sunshine – the only truly flawed pick on your list. Sunshine is a great movie!
Twitter: Top10Films
May 30, 2012 8:43 am
Haha…great list Heather!
I do quite like What Lies Beneath though, I think Zemeckis has done worse films.